When the Heart Lies Read online

  “Are you okay, Kinsley?”

  “I think so. Does being okay make me awful?”

  He turned her, so she was facing him when he spoke and kissed her other shoulder. “No. No, it doesn’t. It’s normal to question things. Maybe you always will. Don’t let this consume you. Promise me you won’t. I’m here. If you need to talk, I’m here.”

  He tilted her chin upward so her eyes met his. The pad of his calloused thumb slid across her lips. When the salty digit crossed them again, they instinctively parted and came down softly, sucking only the very tip. A little cry of guilty frustration stole out. He covered her cry with his mouth, taking the sound from her. Her entire body floated into the warmth and suppleness of the kiss. Open mouthed, they searched, each movement brought new and secret longings. Hands traveled slowly and freely, both taking and leaving imprints of each other’s need. When his hand cupped her breast, the heat from his skin soaked deep into her body, and when his finger and thumb took the nipple between them, squeezing, the sensation pulled like a ripcord on both her sex and her conscience. His dick jerked. She spun around breaking away from his embrace and jumped from the bed, gathering her robe up around her.

  She turned her head away, feeling childish for the sudden outburst. “I’m sorry, I don’t—I want to …” She really did want to, but she was afraid if she did, she’d never be able to stop.

  He closed his robe and got up from the bed, backing out as he spoke. “I shouldn’t have gotten into bed with you. I—”

  She stopped him, making eye contact again. “It’s okay. I needed you here, and I was glad when you came to me. I’m not sure why I jumped up. I…” Love and security blanketed her when he slid into her bed only hours ago. Why panic now? Her head was unsettled. That must be why she was being so ridiculous.

  He gathered his beer bottle and the teacup. The mood turned awkward. “Everything’s okay,” he said. “I’ll go. I have a few things I need to take care of before we head to the police station. Remember, this is all just routine questioning. Are you hungry? Do you need anything?”

  She fidgeted and glanced away. “Not right now.”

  He nodded and turned, leaving the room and closing the door behind him.

  She realized when he was gone she wouldn’t be able to connect with him until she saw Max with her own eyes. They’d been separated before, but not under these types of circumstances. Even though he was safe at home, she needed him to hear her say she would be home with him soon. Mid-morning would be a good time. She’d call him then.

  Less than an hour later, she was drifting in deep thought. She sat, hugging her knees to her chest in the bed side chair and attempting to make sense of all that had happened. A knock broke into her thoughts, and it was a welcome intrusion.

  Jackson poked his head around the door. “I have a surprise for you.” In his hands, he held an open laptop computer with the Dora the Explorer theme song playing in the background. “I borrowed the laptop from the hotel.” He spun the laptop around to face her, and Max’s face was smiling back.

  A yelp of happiness slipped from her. She was touched he was able to anticipate her needs, even though he’d only known her for a short time. After a long, reassuring video call with Max, she was convinced he was happily enjoying the long awaited reunion with Nick and Xavier.

  Chapter 20

  The cooler weather confined Xavier and his morning routine to the breakfast nook. The fall leaves and the shimmering sunlight on the calm water contrasted the glare of the summer sun and hectic boating traffic of the season. He sat, gazing out at the lake. In his relaxed position, he appeared peaceful. With all family members safe and accounted for, his cell phone sat on the table beside him, silent. He seem to be unaware of Jonathan entering the kitchen until he spoke.

  “Good morning, Xavier.” Jonathan poured himself a cup of coffee and topped off Xavier’s before sitting with him at the table.

  “Morning. I was hoping I’d catch you before I went out. Angela’s ready to go to rehab. In Texas. From what her doctor says, the treatment is the best money can buy. The hospital staff is arranging for her transportation. She’ll leave the day after tomorrow. I’ll join her the day after Kinsley comes home.”

  Jonathan nodded. “I’ll make the arrangements. Perhaps you could vacation there and take some time for yourself. Any business could be done remotely.”

  “So, you’re telling me to get the hell out of town and not get in the middle of anything?”

  “Precisely.” Jonathan was indispensable. When Xavier needed to hear the truth, he’d always deliver.

  “I’ve been thinking the same thing. This time, if Nick and Kinsley are going to try to make their marriage work, I need to step back. I can’t be the confident shoulder for Kinsley to lean on. That shoulder has to be Nick’s. Well, she should be home tomorrow or the day after. We’ll have a small dinner here for her homecoming.” His cell rang, and he picked it up, checking the caller ID before answering.

  “Good morning, Olivia. How are things going down there?”

  “Well, everything appears to have happened just as Kinsley said. Jackson’s bringing her in today. What the DA does with the case is out of my hands.”

  “I understand. I’m glad Jackson agreed to stay. I didn’t want a total stranger with her.”

  “Well, I’m sure they’re far from strangers at this point. I hope you know what you’re doing. Jackson’s in love with her, you know. Nick will be lucky if she comes home at all.”

  “I had my suspicions about his attachment to her. She’ll come home, though. How long she’ll stay is still a mystery. I suppose a lot will depend on how she and Nick come together after all this time.”

  Nick came into the kitchen as Xavier’s call ended.

  “Nick. Just the person I wanted to talk to. When Kinsley comes home, I want to have a small family dinner for her. I thought she’d want to visit with Mia, too. That is, if she doesn’t know about the two of you. Would you mind calling and inviting her? It’d be better if Mia heard from you that Kinsley’s coming back.”

  Nick took a long sip of his coffee. “Just invite her. What difference will it make who she hears it from?” He turned and left.

  ~ ~ ~

  When Kinsley and Jackson returned to the hotel from the police station, she went to the balcony, finally clearheaded enough to take in her surroundings. The penthouse suite was spectacular with a breathtaking view of the Atlantic. The boats were alive, festive, and the people on the beach were oblivious to the tropical dreams they painted for the onlookers. The day was one of the longest of her life, yet the sun was just setting. She should be exhausted, but her only need was for a long, hot bath, room service, good wine, and some easy company. The questioning at the police station was grueling and long, but the detectives were kind and not overly suspicious considering she had been the victim. Still, it wasn’t without guilt that she relayed the story several times. Jackson tried to explain that in a situation like this, she was doing the best for all concerned: her family, and herself. She resolved to buy it.

  Jackson sized up the generous amount of boxes and bags Xavier sent. “Think he thought to send me clean underwear?” He had a doubtful smirk on his face. “I’m wearing the ones the hotel sent back from the cleaners this morning.”

  She pursed her lips and mockingly said, “I’m sure I could find something for you.”

  His full lips gathered to one side. “Sorry, nothing you have could hold me.” His eyes twinkled, but he managed to avoid the big wink. “I saw a men’s shop downstairs, I’ll pick up some things while you’re in the bath, if you’re okay with me leaving.”

  “That’s fine, but be sure to come back. New clothes don’t count unless you show them off to someone when you get them.”

  He peered around the corner. “I vaguely remember the customary post-shopping torture from living with Scar.”

  She laughed, flipping her hair over her shoulder with the swing of her head. “Well, since you’re not my u
ncle, maybe we can speed up the process. I’ll just show you the stuff as I wear it. If something catches your eye, you can take a closer look. You’re free to take a little time shopping. I’m going take a long bath and bask in this luxury.” The relief of seeing for herself that Max was safe lifted the cloud of doom that blanketed her for months.

  He studied her.

  “What?” she asked.

  “If it makes you this happy to take a bubble bath, there’s no end to the pleasures lying ahead for you in a place like this. Lock the door behind me.” He pushed himself from his position in the door frame that had afforded him an optimal view and headed down to the lobby.

  With soft music playing in the background and candles lit, it was easy to put the last few months behind her and forget they ever existed. It was just as easy to pretend there was no future waiting for her. For now, at least. Scales of hardness were shedding from her interior, as well as her exterior. She was beginning to believe, that when she stood up from the bath, she might actually resemble a woman again. She toweled off, wrapped the huge cotton hotel robe around herself, and dried her hair, taking care to pat the waves into shape. That’d be the extent of her styling.

  She heard Jackson come in and hollered passed the crack in the door. “I’ll be out soon. Did you get everything you need?”

  “Got it. Do you want me to order room service?”

  “Sounds great. Get me something decadent and messy. I want to eat with my hands and need to lick my fingers when I’m finished. A culinary experience for those who have been force fed farm food for nearly six months.”

  Jackson shook his head and laughed softly. “So, she wants a big, fat, greasy cheeseburger and fries,” he whispered.

  She slipped the champagne gold silk chemise over her head and let the fabric fall, savoring the sensations the silk brought to her still sensitive, freshly bathed skin. The chemise was much too short for dinnertime comfort, but the matching robe was knee length.

  After stepping into some skimpy silk panties, she slid her hands up her thighs and over her body. Xavier had thought of every need. She slipped her feet into the matching low-heeled slippers.

  Jackson knocked softly on the already opened door. “Room service has arrived. Dinner’s out on the terrace.”

  She smiled. When his wandering eyes complimented her, her thick dark lashes lowered toward her warm cheeks, which were surely red, and then raised again. By the time her eyes reached his, she deemed the deep connection kindred.

  The terrace was inviting and intimately lit by the multitude of hotel lights on the beach. The waves echoed from below, and the temperature wasn’t too warm—the perfect night. When Jackson revealed the cheeseburger under the dome, she smiled and laughed softly.

  “Perfect, just what I wanted. Only one thing could’ve made it better.”

  As she spoke, he lifted the cover off a small plate, revealing several strips of bacon. She tilted her head to the side and looked at him in an odd way. “Are you for real? I’m beginning to wonder just how closely you were watching me.”

  “Almost nonstop. Does hearing that bother you? We can talk about anything. I’m free to tell you everything now.”

  Caught smack dab in the middle of a big juicy bite of her burger, she looked up. Waving her hand in circles around her mouth, she signaled a reply would follow. She furrowed her eyebrows, intent on finishing so she could get her words out, but first a few moans erupted instinctively from the pleasure of the tasty burger. She dabbed at her mouth with her napkin.

  “I’m sorry. I’ve been told by some I eat as if I’m in love with food. I’m not.” She waved her hand over her mouth again. “I’ve just always had this oral thing.”

  Jackson leaned back in his chair with his hand propped at his mouth. She could make out the smirk beneath.

  He reached his hand around the back of his neck and massaged the nape before glancing up again with a flirtatious smile. “An oral thing. Yeah, I suffer from the same affliction. It can be hell to keep satisfied.”

  His animated response brought to her attention what she’d said. “You’re incorrigible. Look at you, sitting there amused at my expense.” She tried to refrain from letting out bits of laughter, shook her head, and took another bite, smaller this time. When she finished, she mocked herself with a seductive show of licking her fingers. “So, how long have you been watching me?”

  “Since you arrived in Orangevale, and more intimately since you left Lakeside.”

  She hesitated, appearing thoughtful. “Wayde found a listening device the morning he took me. Was the bug yours?”

  “Yes, we thought the audio was necessary.”

  She nodded, processing and accepting the fact she had been secretly listened to. “Wayde thought Angela had it planted. He didn’t trust her, he said as much. But he had a thing for her, that was obvious. He became crazy angry when he thought she betrayed him.”

  “You found out about Angela?”

  “Yesterday morning was the first time he used her name. I don’t believe she set up the kidnapping, though. I can’t imagine her involved in any of this. I didn’t want to say anything to anyone until I spoke to her.”

  “That’s very generous, but you may never get the chance. She had a stroke and is unable to speak.”

  Kinsley’s head shook slowly as she lowered her eyes. She didn’t want to imagine Angela in such a way. “That’s awful. I guess we’ll never get the full story.”

  “Kinsley, she betrayed your entire family. She took advantage of your personal and emotional weaknesses. Why would you just forget it?”

  “Because some things are better left in the past, and most mothers will do anything to keep their families happy and safe. We all have secrets, and they aren’t for someone else to tell. I’ll try to forgive her. Besides, doesn’t she suffer now anyway?” She got up and walked to the terrace banister. Her mood slumped.

  He followed, placed his hand on her shoulder, and took her hand with the other. “Any secrets you need to unburden yourself of would be safe with me. You’d be safe with me.”

  She whipped around to face him. “You say those things, but you have no idea the burden you’re asking for. It’s easy for me to pretend things could be different. But pretending can only go on so long and then—reality check. You’ll see me for what I am. Once that happens, you’ll no longer find me so pleasant to be with. I refuse to commit to loving a man again. I’ve taught myself to love like a man, in short bursts of passionate pleasure. That’s what fills me now. Romance and forever? Those things are for fairytales.” She turned from him, knowing she’d already breached her refusal to love him.

  He countered her words, crossly. Just inches from her face, his pointed finger punched the air as his voice raised in genuine anger. “You act like loving someone is a choice. The fact is you’re afraid of love, so you take what’s convenient. Or what you contrive because you think you can control the outcome. Even worse, you cling to a love built on your own insecurity. A love that is very, very, messy.” His words stabbed her to the bone like a carelessly injected needle. She slunk back against the banister, stunned.

  “How dare you say those things to me? You comprehend nothing of whom or why I love.”

  He turned from her, putting distance between them and then bounded back. “I comprehend there’s a closet full of clothes and jewelry from a man who’s been obsessed with your safety! And that man isn’t your husband.”

  He didn’t see it coming when she slapped his face full on.

  The heat of rage prickled her face. “Xavier is a respectable man! He wanted me to be comfortable, and he wanted Nick and me to enjoy our time together. Why do you have to make it something dirty when it was done out of pure kindness? This stuff is nothing to him.”

  He waved his hand toward the bedroom. “Because, I’m not stupid. He did all of that without asking for as much as one size. Do you want me to show you how a man knows a woman’s size without asking?”

  She stood with
contempt in her eyes, and did not move when he deliberately took his time closing the distance between them. His face came close to hers, and his heat warmed her skin, leaving the surface tingling with the expectation of touch. Still, she didn’t move. She didn’t want to and couldn’t bear to. Her breath quickened when his fingers trailed up the side of her thigh like feathers. With his other hand laid gently on her throat, he traced the outline of her mouth and chin with his thumb. Irregular wispy strokes of his lips highlighted the route his thumb had taken. She absorbed his scent and committed to memory the texture of his lips against her skin as they moved over the curves of her collarbone and shoulders. She gasped when he moved to her silk covered breast, and his hand slid beneath to grasp one fully.

  “Perfect C cup—34 C to be exact.” His whisper was raspy and provocative as he slipped his hands around her waist and over her firm round bottom. “Size 8—6 in a dress.”

  The sliding of his hand over her ass warmed her, making her twinge. She squeezed her legs together. He pressed firm against her, and her body responded to his, or was it his to hers? Short gasps, she struggled to hold back, seeped out, spiraling into delicious whines of pleasure. Unrelentingly, he seized her mouth. The slight involuntary parting of her lips welcomed him in, and he entered without hesitation and with intimate familiarity. The balmy hand still cradling her bottom slid downward and hitched her thigh up, thrusting her firmly against the banister. She wanted desperately to spread her legs, so he could fall into the groove, and be welcomed full on. Instead, she choked back choppy pants that begged for him. He drew his lips from hers and probed the depths of her eyes. By surprise, he bent down, leaned his shoulder into her belly, and grabbed the back of her thighs. Then he scooped her up and carried her to the bedroom.